Solid Energy Gets Coal for Christmas (New Zealand)

24 Novem­ber 2008
Long-time envi­ron­men­tal activists Mr and Mrs San­ta Claus, were very rough­ly removed from Sol­id Ener­gy’s Annu­al Meet­ing in Auck­land today for attempt­ing to bring atten­tion to Sol­id Ener­gy’s cli­mate chang­ing prac­tices. The meet­ing was a pub­lic­i­ty stunt. Sol­id Ener­gy even said at the meet­ing that it is not like­ly to con­tin­ue to have open meet­ings in the future.

Don Elder pieing24 Novem­ber 2008
Long-time envi­ron­men­tal activists Mr and Mrs San­ta Claus, were very rough­ly removed from Sol­id Ener­gy’s Annu­al Meet­ing in Auck­land today for attempt­ing to bring atten­tion to Sol­id Ener­gy’s cli­mate chang­ing prac­tices. The meet­ing was a pub­lic­i­ty stunt. Sol­id Ener­gy even said at the meet­ing that it is not like­ly to con­tin­ue to have open meet­ings in the future.

Mr Claus deliv­ered a sack of Coal to Sol­id Ener­gy CEO Don Elder for his naughty behav­iour this year and Mrs Claus aimed a home-cooked pie at his face. Don greed­i­ly accept­ed the coal, but unfor­tu­nate­ly man­aged to deflect the pie.
Sol­id Ener­gy is intent on stay­ing in the fan­ta­sy world that the coal indus­try has cre­at­ed, where the myth of “Clean Coal” is a sen­si­ble solu­tion to cli­mate change. So mem­bers of the Save Hap­py Val­ley Coali­tion (SHVC) thought that per­haps what was need­ed was anoth­er fan­ta­sy char­ac­ter to help bring Sol­id Ener­gy back to real­i­ty. How­ev­er, not even San­ta Claus him­self could per­suade CEO Don Elder of the obvi­ous fact that coal is dirty.

Mr and Mrs Claus want­ed to demon­strate their frus­tra­tion at Sol­id Ener­gy’s dis­re­gard for the future of the plan­et, their con­tin­ued min­ing and export of coal, and their plans to turn the pris­tine wilder­ness of Hap­py Val­ley on the South Island’s West Coast into an open cast coal mine, killing crit­i­cal­ly endan­gered species includ­ing kiwi in the process. Mr and Mrs Clause are being per­son­al­ly effect­ed by cli­mate change as their home­land in the North Pole melts away before their very eyes. They will soon be added to the grow­ing list of cli­mate change refugees.

“Don Elder has been a very naughty boy again this year,” says SHVC spokesper­son San­ta Clause.

“He’s not get­ting any presents from me this year, just dirty, car­bon-emit­ting coal, which unfor­tu­nate­ly he has far too much of already!”

In fact, Don Elder was quit eager to accept the gift of coal from San­ta, snatch­ing it greed­i­ly from San­ta’s hands.

After attempt­ing to deliv­er some of her home bak­ing to Sol­id Ener­gy CEO Don Elder, which he was­n’t so keen on, Mrs Clause had this to say,

“Every year Don is told he needs to stop pro­mot­ing fos­sil fuels that cook the cli­mate, but he just won’t lis­ten to rea­son. I thought maybe a nice, home-cooked pie to the face might be the kind of rea­son­ing he would under­stand.”

SHVC chose to take a very light-heart­ed approach today to what is a in fact a very seri­ous issue. The pub­lic knows the real­i­ty of cli­mate change, and that coal is a dirty, pol­lut­ing sub­stance which we should be leav­ing in the ground rather than min­ing. Sol­id Ener­gy would like to con­vince us that prof­it is more impor­tant than the future of the plan­et and that coal can some­how be clean. But sen­si­ble peo­ple know how ridicu­lous that sounds. Clean coal tech­nolo­gies are imprac­ti­cal and unproven. There is no such thing as clean coal.

http://www.savehappyvalley.org.nz